Pity Party

This morning my dad and I had a bit of a blowout about much of nothing. It got out of hand pretty badly because my emotions are very frazzled right now from being out of work. We both said things we regretted, and I left the house very pissed off. I let that anger fuel my sense of hopelessness about my job-finding troubles. I let those feelings feed and feed until I found myself unable to talk to anyone. Not too many people want to hire a grown man who looks like he's been crying, and can hardly talk without choking up. Yuck.

Looking back, of course, it's pretty embarrassing. I threw myself a pretty hardcore pity party while driving down the road. Actually, I've been having a lot of self pity the past few days. I've got to get over myself. I am better now. Fortunately for me, I have someone as precious as Sabine in my life. She listened to me piss and moan for a minute, and then told me (more or less) to get over myself and talk to my dad when I got home and to not wear my feelings on my sleeve. This is definitely not the time for that. She was right.

I filled out a few more applications, and I've got an interview tomorrow morning with K-Mart. I believe it's a overnight-stock position. It's not exactly what I'm shooting for, but it's definitely better than spinning my wheels not doing anything. Sabine gave me some great advice (as usual) and I love her for it. She's been feeling a little under the weather lately, and I wish I could take that from her. I hate it when she's in any kind of discomfort.

Anyway, enough of that sappy feeling sorry for myself stuff. I've got it better than most. I've got a roof over my head, food in my kitchen, a vehicle that will get me from A to B. More importantly though, I've got the love of the best woman in the galaxy. Why she loves me and puts up with my nonsense sometimes is beyond my comprehension. I don't ask why the sun shines, though. I'm just thankful for the light and the warmth.